its been so long since ive gotten on and im really sorry again. so this time, im going to give the scoop on alot of different aspects that have changed.
anthony and shane: ive decided that im going to simply accept them as just friends, and if anything happens <3, then anything happens
anthony: my school went to disney land and i didnt go so one of my friends brought me back a lollipop. then all that day, ( because it stuck out of my pocket) people kept steeling it from me. so i had to keep taking it back. then anthony took it and hid it in his lap while sitting in a huddled position. i walked over, slid my hand right into his lap, and pulled it out. the top of the sucker was almost directly on his crotch, a centimeter more and i would have been raping him. but im a good person and i didnt. surprisingly, his reaction to my hand near his crotch wasnt shocked ( like everyone elses near us). he was actually relaxed the entire time, didnt say anything pointing out that i almost violated him. it was almost like he enjoyed it. im going to keep you updated on this one...^^
alex: the girl alex was obsessed with is going out with his best friend. hes ok with it but still, i feel sorry for him. he feels kinda like a loser.
he still tells me he loves me and now he says he wishes he were gay so he could love me T^T, its really cute and sad at the same time. he is the best guy friend i could ask for. he says he doesnt know why i love him so much, and i think that despite everything, he's still a good person, and thats why.^^hes another person that i just cant live without in my life. and so im going to stand by him through everything!
emmi: i dont know if i told you guys this before, but emmi is the one that outed my homosexuality to my entire grade. now dont get me wrong, i love the girl to death, but that just pissed me off a little. i was doing ashow with her and one day she asked me if i was gay and i said yes. so naturally, when you tell someone sompthing as important as that, they wouldnt idely throw it around. so the first day of school came, we all were together in one clump to represent our grade and she sat on my lap and was being really touchy feely. when people came over she would say stuff like, " oh, dont worry, hes gay" and, im not doing anything, he les boys anyway" . this was the time when i was afraid to tell people outside of my closest friend circle. this was the time when i was scared that all my guy friends would treat me different and all the girls wouldnt shut up about there buisness. i didnt want to bee seen as that gay guy named ___, i wanted to be seen as myself with that as a simple charicteristic. at that moment, i wanted to beat her head off! but then i noticed that people accepted it, and some people even praised me for it, so it was ok.
the odd thing now is that she is openly a lesbian and she didnt say anything back then. now she has a girlfriend and is telling everyone. now here comes the net part:
i hope i dont affend anyone but lesbians confuse me. it can be said that most gay guys are born that way and that they attract eachother with feelings ( mostly sexual) , while lesbians dont have as much pull. some girls become lesbians because there tired of men and they need someone more understanding. but that would mean they are looking for love and yet all i see is a lustful friendship. guys have guy friends that they have fun with and they talk about girls with, and girls have there girls to talk about boys with. however, which group do you think has the potential to be closer. you dont see the straight boys holding hands and kissing because there tired of women. its not that easy. men are eather gay, or they stay away from that type of relationship. but women can simply be justified as lonely girls simply wanting a taste of the wild side.now hear this, im not against lesbians, i just simply dont understand the feelings brought on in the partnership.
(now please, dont comment on this particular issue, i dont want alot of debate about it, its just what i think. i also will never push these ieas onto anyone i know. im just sharing a thought i had. one more thing, remember that im realy not a mean person, because i dont want to be seen as one, i just enjoy sharing ideas with you all. please dont gt angry at me.)
thats the scoop for now, i made some adds to the friends chart which are going to be key for understanding the new stuff to come. the info in theredish color is all updates. i will update each time with a different color^^, ok thats it for now, peace~
.//kyros
About Me
- .//Kyros
- i love singing, dancing, music in general. i also love acting and all kinds of thearter. i also just cant possibly leave out my obsession with anime^^. you could just call me an arts kid. at school, i play the guitar(classical), sing, act, and chill with everyone. my school is the one place i will charish forever. my school is diferent from anyone elses. for one, my school does not have sports. im glad about that. also, my school has an arts program that kicks ass!! in the morning i have my academic classes.then i have all of my arts classes right after lunch. artz=luvv^^ my forte is singing, but my secondary talent would be acting. im really good at both. i do alot of outside school work in both fields so i get to be really tired. ill end with this: i looked in the mirror and what did i see, a poser was trying so hard to be me, but if i am the poser, the poser is me, then who is the poser trying to be? ~ simply i enjoy people who are real, not only to others but to themselves. i enjoy people alot and i i hope you will want to join my crusade, on the road to life~
24 January 2009
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3 comments:
You should always feel good about sharing your opinion. Thats what these internets are for!! I would only add that its impossible for guys to understand girls...it doesn't matter if you are gay, straight, etc. Their brains are wired differently, and their emotions and hormones are completely different. I agree that it would be more likely for a lesbian to choose that than probably a guy. Sexuality is just a tricky bitch :-)
Where is this fabled school where people accept being gay? What country!? I want to go there and go back through highschool and be accepted. I was terrified of people finding out...and you were praised. This is amazing!! I am so happy for you.
Much Love,
Steve
Boys and girls are built differently, both physically and mentally. While a lot of research has pointed to it being most likely that we boys are born gay, not as much research has been done on women and lesbianism. Women often get ignored by medical and mental researchers, unfortunately.
Regardless, I don't think women choose any more than we do. Some women who have been abused my men allegedly turn to women but I'm not sure if that's really true. In addition, women who may have done that may have been bi to start. I can't imagine willfully changing one's sexual orientation just because men/women have hurt you.
As for the other part you said, females are allowed by society (in the US, at least) to be more touchy-feely with one another than we males. Plus, straight guys love to see girls making out, for some odd reason. I imagine they think the women will get each other "hot" then they can jump in the middle. Not that that has anything to do with actual lesbianism, of course.
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